| a lot of people have been suggesting baking soda paste, well i recently blew the engine in my car and run it out behind the house... last weekend finally got the parts to fix it and i was layng under the stupid thing in the heat with no shirt on (yeah sexy beast) right in a poisen ivy patch and had no clue till the next morning lol well i called a friend of mine who is a deromtologist and he said go to walmart lol in the health an beauty section where all the foot scrubs and fancy bath oils and junk are (just watch for a section with cute college age girls and you found it) and get yourself a cucumber and melon clay based face mask (for you other guys out there that dont have wives or girlfriends to identify said items its a tube of gunky green stuff that smells pretty horrid! *** VERY IMPORTANT POINT HERE!!! heads up!!! make sure when you get to the checkout you have somthing manly too like a hammer or a screwdriver set to offset the unmanly purchase) take a bath in water as hot as you can stand, stand up and let it sort of drip dry or pat it with a nice soft towl down want to break the blisters if you dont have to. next have your wife, girl, mom, sister (or i guess hooker if your as hard up as i am theese days lol) gently rub this green crap on the entire area and then go play xbox for like 30 - 45 minutes now this stuff is going to dry up and when it does its going to suck a lot of the fluid and oozing crap out of the blisters and your skin and if it works like it did for me, in a day you will hardly even know you had poisen ivy! but know this when this crap dries up it gets hard it will go from icky green paste to hard crusty baked on mud in about a half hour, its going to get uncomfortable and its goingto pull the skin tight (hair too i imagine if your larry the cable guy)your body will look like an arizona landscape with all the cracks from the drying. after its dry go and take a cool looooooong shower when you get out you will feel like... well having the car towed out of the poisen ivy patch and finish putting the stupid thing back together. final score? walmart 4.95, me -1 and the pontiac 10 more points for making me feel like an idiot... AGAIN im selling it on ebay as i am sure it uses some form of mind control on me :) good luck |
